My expulsion from Kindergarten carries lessons today

When I was 5 years old, I was expelled from Kindergarten. Twice. I don't remember what the first expulsion was for, but the second one remains a family legend to this day. Because truly, not everyone gets kicked out of Kindergarten. Twice.

There's a child's rhyme that has hand gestures. The rhyme goes like this:

Here's the church (hands locked together)
Here's the steeple (index fingers up, the rest of the fingers still locked)
Open the door (thumbs out)
And out come the people! (flip locked hands so fingers and palms up)

Cute, huh? Only, I'd been taught the rhyme with a bit of a twist. My version went like this, and I shared it with my entire class. From the front of the room.

Here's the church
Here's the steeple
Open the door
And out come the HYPOCRITES!

Did I mention that my mom was paying an enormous amount of money to send me to a private church school? They might have forgiven me. They might have patted me on the head and told me to nevernevernever say that rhyme that way ever again.

But instead, they asked me if I knew what a hypocrite was. The thing is, I did.

My mother's hippie-radical brother had come down from UC Berkeley and taught me the full meaning of the rhyme and the word. So I dutifully and truthfully answered the teacher's question.

"A hypocrite is someone who says one thing and does another," I replied.

And just like that, I was expelled. I think I was probably expelled for life, but my mother managed to wring just enough sympathy out of the teachers and the headmaster to allow me to finish out the year, with the agreement that at the end of said year, I should find another school to attend. Really, that outcome was just fine with me...it was probably the most miserable introduction to education any kid could have. I was glad to let the door to that school hit my butt on the way out. So why am I spilling my dirtiest secrets here on MOMocrats?

Because the more things change, the more they stay the same.

My parents tried very hard to raise me with a mix of religion which they were not inclined to practice but encouraged me to do by sending me to church with kindly people who were good enough to pick me up and drop me off, and a solid dose of common sense and decency. Today, the nursery rhyme holds more truth than most of what churches preach, and nowhere is that more evident than in our current insane health care debate.

As we gear up for the debate on the Stupak amendment clone to the Senate bill, I find myself muttering that rhyme to myself over, and over, and over. Make no mistake. The introduction and effort to shove an end run around Roe v. Wade has less to do with religious beliefs than it does with the unholy compact churches have wrought with the far right wing.

Where there is an opportunity for a wedge, Catholic Bishops are happy to craft and fill it. The opportunity is created by cynical politicians looking for a way to shove their way down everyone's throats. Just because George W. Bush is no longer in office, don't assume the mantra "You're for us or you're against us" is no longer operative. It has never been more in play than it is right now. These politicians won't hesitate to use children, senior citizens, and yes, women's reproductive systems to achieve their goal: the status quo.

If that doesn't offend you, it should. It offends me, and I still go to church on Sundays and I still acknowledge my own hypocrisy but I also still try to remember that Jesus was a healer. First and foremost, the man healed people. If healing was a core value for Jesus, it seems to me that it ought to be a core value for churches, too.

Cynthia Boaz tells her heartbreaking story over on the Huffington Post of her sister-in-law's battle with leukemia and ultimately, how she lost it last month. I followed her heartbreaking tweets as it unfolded and have watched her try so hard to heal the pain of losing a sister, a kindred spirit at such a very young age. 

"I'll be completely blunt: I regret that I don't have it in me to ponder the countless tragedies of the millions of people in this country without health insurance or the tales those who were dropped right before or after some critical procedure. I barely have it in me after the ups and downs of the past year to get out these few words. But I do need to say this. A person who is seriously ill should not, in this -- the world's wealthiest and most democratic country -- ever have to worry about anything except getting better. How is that not completely obvious? Isn't "taking care of the least amongst us" the essence of the Golden Rule, civilized society, and every major religion?"

Yes, Cynthia, it is. Compassion is the first rule, the commandment that Jesus gave that superceded all of the old laws given to Moses. It was simple: "Love one another."

Cynthia also asks this:

It is mind-boggling to hear incensed Americans shouting in health care town halls that they'll "be damned if they're gonna pay for someone else's medical care!" The phenomenon raises so many questions, starting with: Who are we? Have we really come to view everything as a zero-sum game (a win-lose situation)? Do we really see our interests as mutually exclusive rather than shared? How is it that as a society we have not already agreed that our job is to take care of each other? And until we agree on that, do we really deserve the word "society"? Can healthy people even emerge from a sick society?

Indeed. I don't have answers to these questions. I truly don't. While my church background elicits my restatement that my core value is to "love one another", it would seem that many who claim to be Christians don't view love as reaching to the wellness or at the very least, the equality of others. It seems that taking care of each other is a core value of conservative Christians on a contingent basis: IF the deficit isn't increased; IF every other detail in place today remains in place tomorrow; IF Barack Obama is not President, THEN, and only THEN...will compassion rise. Only THEN will scraps be thrown to the uninsured dogs pawing at the doors.

Hypocrisy. As much as it pains me to move to the next example, it also shines a clear light on how deep and dark and virulent and destructive that hypocrisy has become.

I've met Rick Warren, talked to him. I've read his books, gone to Saddleback Church, know people who attend that church and know the good that some do for others in their community. All of that is great, but I am so incredibly disappointed in his recent demurral -- perhaps even participation -- in the recent controversy over the Ugandan law imposing the death penalty on HIV-positive people who have gay sex.

Does he not understand that the issue here is not HIV, or homosexuality, but the DEATH PENALTY? I have some serious issues with any Christian proclaiming moral authority over the unborn while advocating execution of adults. I don't care if they're criminals. Jesus came in contact with criminals every day and nowhere did He ever, ever tell his followers to stone sinners to death. In fact, he challenged the Pharisees and clamoring crowds to only cast the first stone if they were sinless.

Open the doors, and out come the...hypocrites. Not so unfair an indictment, is it? This group of people, the group who believes that Jesus came to forgive their sins, and who are then called to bring that good news to others -- yes, this is the doctrine in a nutshell -- gave one commandment: Love. One. Another.

There are a lot of other admonitions about judgment throughout the Bible. I'm not hear to preach or convince any non-believers to believe, and I realize that by writing this, I'm indulging in my own form of judgment -- call it reverse condemnation, if you will. But if someone doesn't stand up for the core values of Christianity in the middle of this insanity called a health care reform debate, those who are not Christians might actually think we all believe that HIV-positive people should be executed and women who get abortions are dirty sinners who should be locked into the mold of a criminal for having the choice to get an abortion.

Personally, I see no moral ground for any Christian to argue against standing for a nation that believes we are one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. If we were to add the clause "under God" to that quotation, then those who believe they are "under God" should also believe this: Love. One. Another.

And if they believe that, there should be no objection to raining mercy on people who are suffering, who are in need of a society who believes they are equals, that they deserve access to a doctor, treatment and healing. There should be no condemnation, no death penalty advocacy. Indeed, they should be speaking against such atrocities as a violation of basic human rights.

They should be, but they've partnered with the cynical and the selfish. Not all, but the ones you'll hear this week have. As it was in Kindergarten, so it is now. I will call those who use their religion and beliefs as a weapon the hypocrites that they are, and continue to raise my voice as loudly as possible in favor of those of us who believe otherwise, who believe that being a Christian calls us to be agents of healing, not hurt.

It might mean I am expelled again. It would be worth it.

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Comments

[So Sad]

Karoli, what do you have to say about your HYPOCRITE uncle who filled your young mind with the oldest red herring in the book? I call it child abuse. Your article above is incorrect about Rick Warren. Did your HYPOCRITE uncle tell you to lie to make your points? Did he tell you to twist Christianity and the good news of the gospel to guilt others into paying your bills? What did your HYPOCRITE uncle tell you about the passages in the Bible that extol a person to first look at their plans and determine if they can afford them before committing to them? What did your HYPOCRITE uncle teach you regarding personal responsibility and accountability? What did your HYPOCRITE uncle teach you about the passages in the Bible that tell us if we don't work, we don't eat? I'll bet he has a smug hippie look on his face every time the story is told of the child abuse he perpetuated on his niece.
For a self professed church goer, you continue to give Christians a Bad name. Please keep your blogs on point. The pillaging of others to pay your way. And quit trying to somehow tie Christianity into your secular philosophy.

[Karoli]

Calm down. Your blood pressure must be over the top by now. My uncle is just fine, thank you. And I grew up and managed to learn that while there are many hypocrites in churches, there are many more who are not. The point of this particular post was to shed some light (and some sorrow) that those who are, tend to be those who are also in the limelight.

[So Sad]

No kidding. And that's your only motive? Just to make that one little point? You needed this blog to make this one point? Really?

[Karoli]

Really.

Sent from my iPhone

[Moty]

Mothers, mom or mother are more than housewives, dating, marriage, divorce, children, adoption, fostering, weight loss, pregnancy, school or work they are love, support, nurturing, honor, awards, acknowledgement and family so nominate your mother or motherly figure at www.mother-of-the-year.com today and help make religion, life, peace, world and love more loving. Have a great day.